I often skim through some of the older posts on a number of
blogs and websites I follow, and I stumbled across a post from Tim Ferris’ Four
Hour Work Week Blog from 2007 (http://www.fourhourworkweek.com/blog/2007/09/18/real-mind-control-the-21-day-no-complaint-experiment/)
that really hit home to me. Tim is the
author of the book “Four Hour Work Week” and subsequent follow-up books, and is
always interesting and fun to read, even when the things he’s talking about
don’t directly apply to my life.
In this case, Tim himself had come across a thought
experiment based on a book titled “A Complaint-Free World”, by a minister named
Will Bowen. In his book, Bowen
challenges you to try and make it 21 days without complaining, gossiping, or
criticizing.
Wow. I have noticed
at various points in my life that I have a number of negative people in both my
ancestry and in my life. Names will not
be named. They may not know who they
are. I have also noticed, and this is
key, I’M ONE OF THEM!!!!!
I don’t want to be negative, I really don’t. But I’ll remark on something (tv show, song,
etc) and then realize afterward that I only noticed the negative thing. Why is that???
So as described on Tim’s blog, the key to ending the habit
of complaining is this:
“ … word choice determines thought choice, which
determines emotions and actions. It’s not enough to just decide you’ll stop
using certain words, though. It requires conditioning.”
Short but sweet, this means: “fix the words and you fix
the thoughts”.
Bowen believes it takes 21 days to recondition yourself to
your new non-complaining habit. The
idea he came up with was to give members of his congregation a purple bracelet
– kind of like the Lance Armstrong “Live Strong” bracelets. Each time one of them complained, they were
supposed to switch the bracelet to their other wrist and start again from day
0.
Apparently this was a HUGE hit and really made a difference
in everyone’s lives. So they ended up
having a website and selling bunches of bracelets and trying to spread the
word. Bowen was on Oprah and The Today
Show when he came up with the idea, but I apparently missed out on this whole
movement when it originally happened (back in 2007, as near as I can
tell).
At any rate, I’m doing it now. Starting today.
I’m not going to shell out my meager cash on a purple
bracelet, but as suggested by Tim, I’m going to use a rubber band. Not terribly fashionable, but it should do
the trick.
Oh, and as Tim did when he did this experiment, I’m also
going to add cuss words to the mix. I
do have a bit of a potty mouth, though I’m WAAAAAAAY better then I was back in
college :-). Still, I recognize that I
need to eradicate the profanity.
Will keep you posted on how it goes. And if anyone wants to try it along with me,
dive in and let me know how you’re doing!
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Edited to add: Decided to use a pony-tail holder instead of rubber band. Much more attractive.
Edited to add: Decided to use a pony-tail holder instead of rubber band. Much more attractive.
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